Maverick: Pericolo #1.5 Page 6
“Bastard makes a valid point there,” Billy admits. “You might all hate him for what he’s done, but her hold on him is as strong as his on her.”
“Love,” Enzo scoffs, putting the car into drive, preparing to enter back into the traffic. “It’s good for nothing.”
“It’s good for everything,” Carlo remarks, sounding sincere. “But they’re right; Zane is worth so much more alive than dead now. Maybe it was the other way once upon a time, but the moment she fell in love, he was untouchable.”
“We’ll have to see if Sal thinks that way when we see him,” Enzo mutters, as he joins the thin stream of traffic and drives toward Manhattan.
“How is Gio looking today?” I ask, licking my lips to fill the cut that split them when Gio punched me the other night. “I hope he still looks sorry for himself.”
“Sal found it hilarious you managed to bring him down,” Carlo admits to me. “I guess that wins you some favors you didn’t have before.”
“Yeah, he was quite impressed,” Enzo chimes in, this time with a different attitude. Some of the angst is loosening from his voice. “And we all know that Salvatore loves having men he can use.”
“I plan to be one of those,” I mutter. “Just you wait and see.”
***
We pull into the drive before the gates of the mansion, Enzo lowering his window to tap in the code. It’s not long before I start to feel my heart slowing its beating as my fight-or-flight defense begins to take over, muddling my rationality and questioning my earlier motives.
It escalates as the car comes to a halt and Enzo kills the engine.
I feel bile begin to build in my throat, forming an acidic lump that is both impossible and rancid to swallow around. I struggle to settle my breathing, reminding myself of the simple duty of inhaling and exhaling. My feet feel weighted, but I know it’s my sudden reluctance to enter this house.
Nothing good will come of this initial meeting. I’m not being foolish enough to ignore that fact, but I won’t let it deter me.
“Showtime,” Enzo mutters as we walk into the foyer. “Before we go in, I’m curious about something.”
“What’s that?”
“How did you spend your night of triumphant after pummeling Gio to a pulp?” he asks, a small grin twitching at his lips. “You ran off pretty quickly afterward. I just wondered if you did that so you could plan what it is you’re going to say in there, or if you didn’t bother.”
“No, I spent my evening getting victory lap dances while I plotted my every word,” I mutter, albeit sarcastically. When I look up, they’re all staring me, eyes intently on me. I just break into a weak smile. “I went back to the hotel, cleaned myself up as best I could, had a couple of night-caps, and crashed.”
“Hard by the looks of it,” Enzo retorts, his tone dark. “You need to look sharper because, right now, you still look like a man who hit rock bottom.”
“That’s because I am,” I admit lowly. “But don’t panic, I won’t let that change anything.”
“Guys, it’s time,” Carlo says, now with Manuel by his side. “He’s waiting.”
“Let’s go.” Enzo’s comment ends with his hand coming to my shoulder, gently guiding me forth. “We’ll be there, but it’s all on you, Zane. We can’t help you in there.”
“I know,” I say, straightening up my suit. I take the first step, walking past them all to lead the way. “Let’s get this over with.”
As we walk toward one of the backrooms, the noises get louder. I force myself to forget about the crowd, wanting my sole focus on the man of the house – Salvatore Abbiati. The masses part for me, all eyes drop to focus on me, and I know the reality that is about to crash upon me is going to be suffocating.
“Gentlemen!” Sal announces as I break free of the crowd of men and take my steps forward. “We have a charlatan in wolf’s clothing with us today!”
I step forth, not gesturing a welcome. Instead, I keep my eyes forward, looking at Salvatore with a deadly gaze.
“Oh, how I hate to see a dead man still living.”
“I guess we both have Amelia to thank for that,” I jest, pleased how my voice travels.
“Don’t you dare utter her name,” he remarks, admonishing my joke.
“Why not?” I ask, not purposefully playing dumb. “She’s the common ground we share.”
“And you’re the reason she isn’t here right now,” he replies, his voice taut with mounting aggression. “What is your game, Maverick?”
“I’m playing no game.”
“I know that’s a lie.” He snorts, shaking his head in dismay. “You think you can come into my house and stand straight in front of me, before all of my men, and say you want to be a part of it?!” Sal asks, his voice a sonic boom in the silence of the room. “What brand of fucking crazy are you? Because from where I’m standing, it looks like you’re the suicidal type who likes to tread very fucking dangerously with the wrong crowd!”
I remain silent, knowing there will be a time for my say on this debacle, and sadly, I know it’s not quite yet.
“You come in here, you look like one of us, but you’re just a dirty cop who was more than willing to bring down the Femme Fatale. Then you find out you’re actually sleeping with her. What could possibly possess you to come into my home like this?” he asks, his eyes beginning to burn with fire. “What is your business, Maverick? Spit it out so I can move on with my day.”
“I want to work for you.” My response is vague and blunt.
He chortles at me but stops when he realizes how deadly serious I am.
“You break my daughter’s heart, run like a cowardly bastard and think you can stand in front of me and ask me to do you a favor like I owe you something.”
There’s my cue to play all my cards.
“You owe me everything.”
For a moment, there’s no response, just glances and sheer silence before Sal gains an incredulous look on his face.
“How did you work that one out?” he asks, provoking my onslaught.
“I ran because of you. My entire life fell apart because of you!” I bellow, unable to quell my bursting anger. “I met Amelia without ever knowing who she was or who you were. It started out innocently enough, but quickly, our relationship turned sour because you couldn’t deal with the fact that she had fallen out of love with the life you presented her with and fell in love with the life she always dreamed of having!” I take a step forward, not even making it hesitant. It’s bold and forthright. “You are the reason she’s not here, and I now am.”
“If I’m the bad guy, why would you even anticipate joining my family, Maverick?” he questions, clasping his hands before him. “If I’m the reason your life is in such disarray, why would you beg like a desperate man for a meeting with me?”
“Because I would rather pledge myself to you than run from you for the rest of my life.” I square my shoulders, bracing myself for the real fight. “I would rather work under your name to have even a single moment with Amelia than miss out on ever having the opportunity.”
“You don’t get to make such decisions,” Sal tells me, looking annoyed at my advanced approach. “Men like you have no reason to be here!” Sal bellows, advancing for me. “Men like you are the reason empires fall. You’re the reason powerful women become naïve and dream of silly, pathetic lives.”
I don’t realize his intent at first until I feel his fist hit me square in the stomach. All of the air in my lungs is pushed from me, and I’m left exhausted. I fall forward, and he catches me, his fists clutching at me tightly. I feel his head move forward, steadying by my ear, his grip hardening.
“You don’t die today, Maverick,” he mutters into my ear, venomously. “I’m letting you go so you can live with the constant reminder that you are not enough ... for Amelia, for Billy, especially not for my empire. Men like you are destined to meet your rock bottom at young ages because you aren’t strong enough to be a part of my family. You’re there, an
d you’re desperate.”
I flare my nostrils, trying to keep my strong guise on, but I’m struggling. He knows me like the back of his hand. He’s well versed in my current predicament, in how much I lost in loving and losing Amelia.
“I know outside of these walls no one cares about you, Maverick.” His eyes twinkle, showing he knows more of me than I thought. “So I understand feeling like this is your final hope, but you were grossly mistaken. I am no one’s final choice. Now you’re without family, without a job, without Amelia, you come here and beg me for a chance. I don’t just pick anyone off the streets to be part of the Dio Lavoro. You have to earn the right and your track record has me seriously doubting how loyal you can be when I know just how you feel about me.”
“I could prove myself,” I state, striving for a chance.
“I don’t think so,” he chortles, shaking his head. “And do you want to know why?”
“Why?”
“Because you could never amount to the expectations of my men!” he shouts, making a display of me being here. “Now, I’m granting you the best bargain I can offer. It’s purely selfish of me, of course, but it’s very desirable for you.”
“What?” I grouse.
“I always wanted to watch you die, but watching you leave with nothing to your name is far more victorious. I’m letting you walk away alive.” He steps away, putting his arms out. “Take one last look at me and mine, Maverick, because if we meet again, I’ll do the virtuous thing and put you out of your misery. For now, I’d far rather have you leave jobless, loveless, and lonely. Enjoy the total abandonment because you’ll learn to become acquainted with that life. Mark my words; you’ll never live in peace in this city.” He snickers, licking his lips. “And if you move, I’ll make sure my men follow. You’ll never have a semblance of a normal life after today.”
“How will Amelia feel about that decision?” I dare to ask, keeping hold of my one final piece of hope.
“She doesn’t have a say,” Sal enlightens me. “I made sure the girl you first met was slowly and surely chipped away at. After this stint in Italy, you won’t ever be able to look her in the eyes again. The girl coming home is a product of your love, Maverick. She doesn’t care anymore because the man she loved, and let love her, tore her heart out twice. That’s far too many times for one lifetime. I allowed her to follow her heart and let it lead to you; after the first heartbreak, I thought I could use that to get rid of any trace of you ever living. I may have failed, but you helped sign the death warrant written for you by breaking her heart how you did all those months ago.”
“But I need this to prove to her that I lo-”
“I don’t want to hear it!” he bellows, silencing me midsentence. “Remove him from my house,” Sal orders, dismissing me completely. Two men react, and he watches with a smile as they grab me and start to force my out of the room. “Oh, and Zane ... if I see you back, I won’t hesitate to think of the worst death possible.”
Message received.
***
“I can’t do this.”
The words tumble from my mouth far easier than I expected.
I watch the expression fall from her eyes, the devastation setting in as quickly as the vacant look entered. I watch her inhale, struggling to keep the tears lining her long lashes at bay. She swallows hard and refuses to look away from me.
“What decided it?” she asks me, braving herself to sound assertive. “Me or him?”
“Him.”
My statement forms clarity for her, offering her enough of a response that she doesn’t need any further explanation, but in the same sense, she looks like she wants all the answers in the world to help understand the heartbreak I’m thrusting upon her.
“Your father will always have a hold on you that is too strong to break. I can’t compete with it.” I force myself to look away, if only for a moment, before looking back at her. “I want to offer you the world, Amelia. Foolishly, I want to offer you that house with the picket fence, but that isn’t something made for us. We come from two totally different worlds. I see that now.”
“I could’ve loved you the most,” she utters, not putting up much of a fight. “I’m just sorry I wasn’t worth the wait.”
“Sweethea-”
“Don’t,” she tells me, cutting off my nickname for her. “I thought you’d be the proof I was worth fighting heaven and hell for.”
I met a girl, and I fell in love with her in a heartbeat, but I also prepared for the fact that breaking myself away from her meant in doing so, I broke both our hearts.
I watch her walk away. The first woman I found myself ever truly able to love, and I threw her aside because of my own prejudices.
Because of the weak man I am, I broke two hearts today – hers and mine.
I don’t know if I’ll be granted a second chance, but I deserve this pain as penance.
Besides, I was never worthy of her in the first place.
CHAPTER EIGHT
AMELIA
“Were you born stupid?”
I bristle as the conversation is directed at me. I’ve done a good job of just ignoring the two idiots I’ve been sent on a job with, but now that we’re out of headquarters and on a job, I’m now no longer off-limits. We’ve just finished dropping a package off for Alberto, but now, I just want to go back to the mansion and waste another day.
“Or was it what happened when your father killed your mama?”
I stop, turning to face the two little bastardos, shocking them both.
“What did you just say?”
I should smirk as I watch their bravado lessen and disappear on them entirely, but I don’t. I keep my face stone-like and emotionless. I take a step toward them, and they take a step back. What pathetic excuses for men they really are.
“Don’t you ever mention my mother or my father in the same breath or to me ever again. Do I make myself clear?”
“Yes,” one of them replies.
I turn back and walk into the abandoned building where our car is parked.
“Why did you fall for a cop?”
I stop at the question – that same fucking question. I swear, if I had a dollar for every time someone asked, I would be rich in my own right by now.
“I mean, I understand fatal attraction but with a cop? Nah, I can’t make my brain understand that.” He looks at me, his crystal blue eyes staring straight at me. “What was it that made you fall in love? The uniform or the way he hurt you the first time?”
“Guess it was the fatal attraction,” I remark, an honest tone carrying my name.
Fatal attraction – that’s my favorite expression when I think about my relationship with Zane. I should’ve heeded the warning that came with loving him once when I delved into a second chance romance with him, but I didn’t. I threw caution to the wind and loved him so openly while struggling to balance love and life. My life – the one I’m thrust into here – would always eclipse whatever my heart felt because no one is a match for the Dio Lavoro.
I thought Zane Maverick could be it, but sadly, he wasn’t.
Everyone assumes that because he broke my heart, I should hate him, but love isn’t that easy. Love isn’t black and white. It’s cutthroat; it’s addictive. Love is full of so many colors, so many emotions, that it isn’t that easy to cut it off when it ends.
And the stupid side of me knows we aren’t done.
Zane Maverick loved me so unconditionally while not knowing the full extent of my alter ego that I knew how it felt to be whole-heartedly in love. We loved without abandon.
Just because it ended doesn’t mean I lose hope because if I do that, then I have nothing to live for.
He gave me two perfect times to love him, and now I’m pulled away from all I know, but that doesn’t mean I can stop what my heart desires. It’s not that easy. It won’t ever be that easy. He loved me at my best, adored me at my worst. I can’t forget how that felt. I won’t forget how it felt because if I do, then I lose
my grasp on the true me, on the person I always wanted to become.
They can make their comments, throw their jest mockery around, but believe me, I’ll be saving a taste of the Amelia Abbiati the Dio Lavoro wants just for them.
After all, Zane isn’t here to calm my anger or distract me from getting even. No, Zane is back in America alone, hopefully running like I told him to and settling into a new life – without me.
“You know one of the men I killed took one of my stilettos to his neck, right?” I ask, breaking my own reverie.
“From what I heard, he was trying to rape you.”
“And you’re pissing me off just as much,” I state, grinding my words out. I watch him try to look me in the eyes, try with all his might not to look scared, but I know deep down they all worry about the volatile bitch that I keep on lockdown. “Trust me, coglione, what I wouldn’t mind doing to you.”
“I heard you did those last killings for the cop,” the one with blue eyes says, antagonizing me. “Called them your swan song, didn’t you?” He steps closer, clearly finding some courage. “You know what you are, Amelia? You’re a cop lover. You can’t be on our side and theirs. You can’t be both.”
“Just get in the fucking car,” I order them, unable to continue this conversation. “Before I do something you’ll never forget.”
I see the smirk that curls on his lips as he walks past me, but I ignore it, allowing my gaze to drop and my eyes flutter close while I muster some courage back. He thinks he’s won, and my lack of fight clearly proves that.
He’s right; I killed to protect Zane, and I even called those last three kills my swan song because after I was done sticking my stiletto in Big Al’s jugular, I knew I had no other reason to kill anyone else. He had beaten me, attempted to rape me, so his death held more meaning. It meant I was going out on a high, but it also meant I was now free to go to Zane and truly love him without waiting for my kill list to grow.
I allow them to pass, but as they do, I crouch down, picking up a sliver of broken glass.